Monday, 14 January 2008

Every day is April Fool's at Rapture Ready

I'm a glutton for punishment, and I've been reading the threads at the Rapture Ready forums.
Rapture Ready. Now there's a whacky world of weirdness. Just read their posting rules to see how uptight and twisted they are. I love rule 30. "No liberal agendas". Rule 16 states "We believe that the Holy Bible (old and new testaments, 66 books) is the only true Word of God in its entirety and fullness, is perfect without error and not open to private interpretations." But then in rules 11, 15, 26, 28 and 29 they ban any speculations on interpreting the scriptures. If I was god, passing my ideas to mankind via a book I'd make sure the meaning was unambiguous.

Anyway . . .

There was a joke posted about atheists, and it irritated me a lot, because the joke was stupid, rather than funny, and posted in an area where non-believers aren't allowed to post.
Here's the joke:
I have no idea if this actually happened, probably not, but thought it was good enough to share anyway.

(Some judges do have a sense of humour)
Have you heard about this case? Great answer from The Judge!

In Florida , an atheist bece incensed over the preparation of Easter and Passover holidays. He decided to contact his lawyer about the discrimination inflicted on atheists by the constant celebrations afforded to Christians and Jews with all their holidays while atheists had no holiday to celebrate.

The case was brought before a judge. After listening to the long passionate presentation by the lawyer, the Judge banged his gavel and declared,

"Case Dismissed!"

The lawyer immediately stood and objected to the ruling and said, 'Your honor, how can you possibly dismiss this case? The Christians have Christmas, Easter and many other observances. Jews have Passover, Yom Kippur and Hanukkah...yet my client and all other atheists have no such holiday!'

The judge leaned forward in his chair and simply said, 'Obviously your client is too confused to even know about, much less celebrate his own atheists' holiday!'

The lawyer pompously said, 'Your Honor, we are unaware of any such holiday for atheists. Just when might that holiday be, your Honor?'

The judge said, 'Well it comes every year on exactly the same date---April 1st! Since our calendar sets April 1st as 'April Fools Day,' consider that Psalm 14:1 states, 'The fool says in his heart, there is no God.' Thus, in my opinion, if your client says there is no God, then by scripture , he is a fool, and April 1st is his holiday! Now have a good day and get out of my courtroom!!

Way to go, Judge!

The particularly irritating thing was the way the numbnuts on the board presume it's a real story and not a joke:
"That is priceless!! I can just imagine the apoplectic looks on the faces of that lawyer and his atheist client!!
That judge deserves a medal!"

and
"I have seen the coming of this type of Holiday idea. I am very glad that the judge did have a great way of putting things. Unfortunately many other judges will not do this. We are in tough times. Buz and Moderators, your stuff was good. Check your pm. I love having the opportunity to share a truthful opinion, and even though I disagree with one of the posters, I would only gently tell them that Atheists have no love for our faith. God does not believe in Atheists. That is even more interesting.
Stand for what is righteous, true, perfect, praiseworthy, and even focus upon these things. I search for all the truth, and this situation is actually funny at the moment, but it may not do so well in the 9th circuit court CA."

If the story is true, where is the date, the names? What court was this? What courts have the rights to set holidays?
And the judge is talking bollcks anyway, because April Fool is not a public holiday. It's just a date with associated traditions, like Halloween or Valentine's day.
And there already are nonreligious holidays. Most countries have national day like July 4th or July 14th in France. In France we also have May 1st as a holiday (Labour Day)
I can't imagine any atheist pleading for a special holiday. I like the ones we already have just fine. Easter and Christmas fall so close to Spring Equinox and Winter Solstice that they make ideal times for a break and a celebration.
So, here's the joke re-hashed.
A christian & an atheist were talking at work.
"It's not fair that there are so many religious holidays and no special days for atheists"
"But you do have a special day" replied the christian
"I suppose you mean Haloween" said the atheist, because the christian might think all atheists were evil
"No, April Fool's day"
"What's April Fools got to do with atheism"
"Psalm 14:1 states, 'The fool says in his heart, there is no God.'"

Voila - same idea, same triumphant christian at the end, a mini-joke midway with the haloween thing and no bullshit about courts, judges or "pompous lawyers"

2 comments:

Samanthamj said...

it's one of those urban legends... and a very idiotic one at that. I'm also always amazed at how many people believe and forward on these type of emails every day...
Ugh!
~smj

Samanthamj said...

forgot the link:

http://www.snopes.com/politics/religion/atheist.asp